


Whispered Stories

by Autumnalpalmetto



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Youtuber AU, adhd jeremy, asmr youtuber Jean, avid asmr fan Jeremy, gradschool AU, jeremy also has anxiety and panic attacks, meet ugly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:28:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28490922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autumnalpalmetto/pseuds/Autumnalpalmetto
Summary: Jeremy has insomnia and listened to asmr to go to sleep. His favorite youtuber is named Jean, but no one knows that. One day he runs into someone with his bike and it changes his life.
Relationships: Jeremy Knox/Jean Moreau
Comments: 7
Kudos: 31





	Whispered Stories

Jeremy, like most kids with ADHD and Anxiety, had trouble sleeping. It fluctuated from taking a bit longer to fall asleep to full on insomnia and back. He’d tried everything from keeping a consistent schedule and working out to prescriptions sleep aids. Nothing seemed to help. One night, after an hour spent browsing YouTube meditation videos, Jeremy fell into an ASMR rabbit hole. 

For the first time in weeks, months, years, he slept like a baby. 

He tried it again the next night and the next, getting the same result every time. Falling asleep to people whispering in his ear was the easiest thing he had ever done. It got him through college, helped his grades, and even helped him make new friends.

About a year ago Jeremy stumbled onto a new channel, a French man by the name of Jean. Jean, said the French way. Not like Sean or John or god forbid Gene. It was just  _ Jean _ . It took Jeremy a week of correcting himself to get to the point that he read it the correct way in his head. When Jeremy found him, he listened to those nine videos on repeat every night to put himself to sleep. Where it took other ASMRtists half an hour to put him to sleep, it took Jean only a few minutes. His voice was rough but his accent was rounded, it gave Jeremy chills the first time he heard it. Most of the videos were whispered stories, which allowed an even softer tilt to his voice, but Jeremy loved the rare ones where he spoke at full volume even more.

In High School, Sherlock came out and everyone fell in love with Benedict Cumberbatch’s voice. Jeremy had never gotten it, his friend once told him it sounded like a jaguar, but that was nonsense. Listening to Jean speak every night, Jeremy suddenly understood. 

Jean’s only user name was Jean on every social media site, and Jeremy wondered how the stars had aligned for him to be that lucky. Jeremy didn’t know if that was his real name, or what he looked like, but after a few weeks, he knew that voice better than he knew anyone else's. 

Jeremy tried to show his friends, but none of them got ASMR in general, let alone the rough French boy who was hard to understand. After making them all listen to one and getting nothing but negative feedback, Jeremy decided to keep Jean to himself. 

Over the next year, Jean privated most of his early videos, but he said anyone who was following him at the time was welcome to save the links and continue to watch, as long as they didn’t spread them around. Jeremy saved the links the second he saw the post, there was no way he was losing Jean’s content. 

Sunday night was the worst night of the week. Everyone knew that. As the weekend came to a close, the stress of the following week came crashing down. Jeremy always hated Sunday nights, which is why he was elated that Jean posted his new videos on Sundays. After listening to them going to sleep, and never missing a new one on Sunday nights, Jeremy found himself looking forward to the dreaded time instead of hating it. 

Not only did Jean help him fall asleep, but he made him love Sundays. Which was a miracle. 

“Jere,” Laila called out as she walked into the apartment. “We’re home.”

After graduating with their bachelor’s degree, Jeremy and his two friends had decided to rent an apartment together for their Masters. The tiny two bedrooms barely fit them all, but it didn’t matter as long as they were together. Jeremy was the third wheel to Alvarez and Laila’s romantic relationship. While Alvarez was the third wheel to Jeremy and Laila’s friendship spanning their entire lives. Somehow they made it all work. It helped that Alvarez and Jeremy were close, but they could never be as close as he was with Laila. 

“Living room,” Jeremy called back. He had just finished commenting on Jean’s Instagram post. 

Every night he gave a shout out to a follower on his insta stories, but on Sundays, he put it in the videos. Tonight’s question was easy, how long have you been watching and what was your first video? That was easy, 52 weeks, and drifting the night away with you. It was still Jeremy’s favorite video, the one that got Jean on the charts, and also the first one he has illustrated himself. While Jeremy rarely watched the illustrations since he was trying to sleep while he listened, he could tell which one's Jean drew himself. He had a sketchy style that fit his voice significantly better than Riko, his normal illustrator. 

“What’s up, babe?” Laila asked as she threw herself into his lap. 

“Watching bake off,” Jeremy shoved Laila onto the floor and laughed when she looked up at him with lying sad eyes. “Wanna join?”

Alvarez sat next to him, pulling Laila up onto her lap as she threw her feet into Jeremy’s. The one bad thing about being friends forever was that they had no sense of personal space. Laila was born one week before Jeremy, in the same rundown hospital room. Their mothers had met at a Lamaze class and became quick friends, raising their children together as their husbands worked the days away farming. Most people didn’t realize just how many small farms there were in southern California. Everyone knew about the big ones with migrant workers, but they skipped over the little family run ones just trying to make ends meet. 

Laila and Jeremy grew up together, went to college together, and became the first members of their families to get degrees together. Growing up everyone thought they would get married, but here they were at 23, both more interested in the same sex than they were each other. 

They all snuggled together on the couch as they watched bake off, ordering pizza and continuing well past the time they should for a school night. Laila dozed off around 1 am and Alvarez carried her to bed, leaving Jeremy alone with his thoughts. A small apartment meant one bathroom, so he had to wait for Alvarez to get ready for bed before dragging himself off the couch. Even with Jean putting him to sleep every single night for the last year, Jeremy still wasn’t capable of going to bed before midnight, most nights it was closer to one or two. He was lucky that he shared an office with his downstairs neighbors and could catch a ride to the university with them.

“Hello dear,” Jean whispered, starting his video off the same way he always did. It was one he illustrated himself, and Jeremy knew he’d have to watch it in the morning. “How was your week, are you ready to start another?”

Jean’s voice was already pulling Jeremy under and it had just started, normally he made it through the first video and onto the second before he got this sleepy. 

“Tonight I would like to shout out a follower who’s been around for 52 weeks and never missed a Sunday. His first video was ‘drifting the night away with you’ which is the first story I personally illustrated and also my favorite to date. Good night Jeremy Knox, sleep well my dear.”

It was the same thing he said every night when he gave a shout out to a follower, but hearing that voice wrap around his name like a blanket, warm and calm, both woke Jeremy up and settled him down. There was no way he was going to sleep anytime soon now, Jean said his name, which meant he saw his comment and looked at his profile for his pronouns. He hadn’t seen Jean’s face because he never showed it even on Instagram, but Jean had seen his. 

Jeremy had missed part of the story in his excitement. He went back and listened to the beginning again, keeping his phone lit so he could watch the illustrations. It was about a man lost at sea with all his belongings, but no one to talk to. Significantly sadder than the usual stories, and Jeremy loved it even more because it was clearly more personal. He had to listen to three more, choosing ones he had memorized long ago before he fell asleep. 

In his dreams, he heard Jean say his name, wrap his voice around the vowels, and soften the word. 

The next morning came too quickly, Jeremy barely made it downstairs to Neil’s car in time. They had a rule that if he was late they would honk once, wait sixty seconds, and then leave without him. Jeremy locked the door just as the honk sounded. 

“Oversleep?” Neil asked as Jeremy climbed into the backseat. Neil’s boyfriend Andrew always got shotgun, even though he was a good ten inches shorter than Jeremy. Not that Jeremy was tall, Andrew was just that short. 

“Late night, couldn’t fall asleep.” Jeremy rubbed his eyes and yawned as they pulled out of the parking lot. 

Neil dropped Andrew off at his law school, then headed to their office. Despite studying different things, they were forced to share an office. It was the last one open in the math department, and no one in their topics was willing to switch. Neil was doing graph theory while Jeremy focused on Cryptography. 

Jeremy followed behind Neil, towering over him because he was short too, just not as short as his boyfriend, until they got to their office. He started up the coffeepot while Neil sat down and got straight to work. Sharing an office with Neil was easy, he was neat and quiet, but it made Jeremy anxious because he was neither of those things. Neil never cared when he spread papers over the entire floor or filled with whiteboards with equations for a week straight, but Jeremy’s mind didn’t care. Anxiety told him he was being a terrible person no matter how many times Neil offered him his whiteboard too. 

After work, they carpooled home and then Jeremy dragged his bike out of their dining room to go to the store. Their dining room didn’t even have a table, it was solely used for storing their three bikes. He could have asked Neil and Andrew to stop on the way home, but he hated being a bother to them more than he hated carrying his groceries home on his bike. 

It was hot in LA, as it always was, the wind felt nice going through his hair as he biked the few blocks to the grocery store. As he was pulling into the parking lot, a little girl dropped her doll right in front of him and he swerved to avoid hitting her. His bike hit a solid wall, then he did, without warning Jeremy was on the ground, tangled together with his bike and another man. A hot man, staring at him like he was a car wreck. 

Which he kind of was.

“I’m so sorry,” Jeremy said as he tried to lift the bike off of his leg. “I was trying not to hit that little girl, and I didn’t see you there. Are you okay? I’m so so sorry.”

The man untangled himself while Jeremy rambled and held his hand out to him.

“It’s alright.” The man spoke with a rough, yet rounded French accent. 

Jeremy stared at him as he tried to remember how to breathe. He knew that voice, better than he knew his own. 

Jean looked Jeremy up and down. “Are you alright?”

When Jeremy didn’t respond, he knelt down beside him and lifted the bike off of his leg. 

“Are you hurt?” 

Jeremy shook his head quickly, looking down at where his bike chair had ripped a hole in Jean’s pants.

“Sorry I froze for a second, I just recognized your voice from YouTube.” Jeremy reached for his wallet and Jean stopped him with a gentle hand in his wrist. “I’m so sorry. This is all my fault, I can pay for your pants. I don’t have a lot of cash on me but I can Venmo you if you’re okay giving your Venmo out. Or I can like mail you a check. Actually, giving your address to a random person on the street probably isn’t a good idea. Venmo is probably better.”

“I think a pair of pants is worth not running over a small child. You’ve done your good deed for the day.” Jean stood up and offered Jeremy his hand again. 

Jeremy looked between his hand and his face as he tried to find more words to apologize with other than ‘I’m so sorry’.

“What’s your name?” Jean asked him. 

“Jeremy Know,” Jeremy said quickly. “I don’t think insurance will cover this. I can just pay you myself.”

“Jeremy, breathe.” Jean knelt down beside him and offered his hand again. “Are you having a panic attack?”

Jeremy couldn't talk as he tried to force himself to follow Jean’s directions and breathe, so he nodded his head. 

“Let’s get you inside and sit down for a minute.” Jean picked up the bike, then held his hand out again. 

This time Jeremy took it and let Jean haul him up. He was stronger than he had looked sitting on the ground, taller than Jeremy with broad muscular shoulders. Once he was standing, Jean placed a hand on his elbow and led him to the bike rack, only letting go for a moment to lock up the bike before placing his hand on Jeremy’s elbow again. All Jeremy could do was focus on his breathing and follow behind him. 

Jean took him to the smoothie bar in the front of the store and sat him down at the table in the corner. They sat together in silence, breathing deeply until Jeremy was able to do it alone without Jean guiding him.

“What would you like?” Jean asked as he stood up.

“Oh, I’m not really hungry.” Jeremy started to stand up. “I should probably let you go, I’ve taken up enough of your time. Thank you for helping me.”

“Sit down, Jeremy,” Jean demanded. “You’re going to give yourself another panic attack.”

Jeremy sat down slowly. Normally he didn’t like people bossing him around when he was anxious, but he had trained his brain to calm down when hearing Jean’s voice over the last year. Instead of Jean’s demand making him more anxious like it would have coming from anyone else, it made him feel safe. 

“You should try to eat something, it’ll help with the shock.” Jean turned and looked over the menu. “Anything in particular you like?”

“Mango,” Jeremy said without thinking, overthinking it. 

Jean nodded. “I’ll be right back.”

Jeremy watched as he ordered and paid, cursing himself when he realized he let the man he ran his bike into buy him something to make him feel better. He should be the one buying Jean something, not the other way around. 

When Jean came back, Jeremy tried to give him a few dollars, but Jean wasn’t having it. 

“Relax, breathe, focus on calming your body down.” Jean took a deep breath, giving Jeremy an example to follow. “There you go.”

Jean’s voice was doing more to help Jeremy calm down than the breathing was, but he wasn’t going to tell him that. It was bad enough he ran his favorite YouTuber over, letting him know how much he liked him would be mortifying. 

“Gene,” the woman at the counter called out. 

Jean rolled his eyes as he got up and collected their drinks. He handed Jeremy a mango smoothie as he sipped on his blueberry one.

“How are you feeling now?” Jean asked after he’d taken a few sips. 

“Better, thank you so much. I really can Venmo you for the pants and the smoothie and everything.” Jeremy rambled on. “You don’t have to take care of me, I’m sure you have things to do today, I probably won’t freak out again.”

Jean narrowed his eyes and looked Jeremy over. Suddenly Laila and Alvarez appeared over Jean’s shoulder. Jeremy froze at the sight of them.

“Oh, look, babe,” Laila said too loudly. “Jer-Bear’s on a date.”

“Jeremy, bro,” Alvarez said as she wrapped her arm around her girlfriend. “This explains so much about why you can’t keep a boyfriend. The grocery store is a terrible place for a date.”

Jeremy could feel the heat rising to his face as he sat frozen in his chair. 

“Breathe,” Jean demanded, sending a glare toward the girls. “Jeremy, breathe.”

Jean took a dramatically deep breath, which Jeremy copied. 

“Fuck, Jer,” Laila said, stepping closer. “I didn’t mean to give you a panic attack.”

Jean put his arm out, stopping the girls from crowding Jeremy. “I can handle this if you don’t mind.”

Alvarez glared at him. “I don’t know who the fuck you think you are, but we are his family.”

“It’s fine,” Jeremy croaked. “Just give me a minute.”

Laila reached out and patted his shoulder. “Okay babe, see you at home.”

It took Jeremy a few minutes to get his breathing under control again. While he was trying to focus on calming down, he kept losing his count on his breaths, Jean looked out over the store and started talking about the people he saw, making up stories about their lives. Jean must have noticed the difference it made in Jeremy because he started talking more, lowering her voice just a little. 

Laila texted Jeremy asking for his shopping list, saying she would get everything he needed so he could go home. Jeremy replied and then stood up.

“Thank you for helping me, I really appreciate it,” Jeremy said, forcing himself to look Jean in the eyes as he stammered on. “My roommates said they’d do my grocery shopping for me, so I can just go home.”

Jean nodded. “How far away do you live?”

“Just a couple blocks, I mostly ride my bike so I can carry more.”

Jean stood up and followed him out, tossing his empty cup in the bin on the way. “Can you make it home?

“I’m not a child,” Jeremy said childishly. 

“I never said you were.” Jean walked him over to his bike and waited while he unlocked it. “A panic attack like that can knock anyone down for a while. I’d feel terrible if you had another on the way.”

Jeremy started walking his bike down the sidewalk, he didn’t think he was stable enough to ride it without falling over at that moment. Jean followed along, chatting about nothing. 

“Kevin,” Jean said with a nod to the man watering the flowers outside the ice cream shop. 

Kevin looked at him like he had two heads. “Jean.”

When Kevin said Jean, he said it properly, adding the perfect French tilt to it. 

“Who’s that?” Jeremy asked once they were out of earshot. 

“Roommate.”

That made sense, LA was expensive enough that even a YouTuber would need a roommate. 

They turned the corner, and suddenly they were at the apartment complex. Jeremy looked at the bike and then at the stairs he had to carry it up. Neil was outside watering his flowers too, ones he could never keep alive for more than a week, but he tried. 

“Jeremy,” Neil called to him. “Jean.”

Andrew poked his head out of the doorway and stared them down. “Jeremy. Jean.”

“Would you like help carrying the bike up?” Jean asked, ignoring the greetings. 

“Yes please, thank you.”

Jean grabbed the bike and lifted it like it was nothing. Jeremy blinked, and he was halfway up the stairs. He waved to Andrew and Neil, then raced up the stairs to unlock the door. Luckily it opened straight into the bike room, so Jean could set it down immediately. 

“It was nice to meet you, Jeremy Knox,” Jean said as he turned toward the door. 

“Wait,” Jeremy said quickly. “How do you know Andrew and Neil?”

“They are friends of Kevin’s,” Jean said, making no move to leave. “I’m surprised we haven’t met before, I’m over there all the time.”

Jeremy stared at him for a moment. Jean. The Jean, who he fell asleep listening to every night, was a friend of a friend. 

“Good night, Jeremy Knox,” Jean said as he opened the door. “Sleep well, my dear.”

The door closed, and he was gone, leaving Jeremy frozen in his place. 

  
  



End file.
